31 Days of Simple Goodness: Truly Beautiful

Posted by on Oct 20, 2012 in Blog Posts | 12 comments

{Today’s post had me in a tizzy as I sat for hours waiting for my words to make sense on a topic I feel so inadequate to cover when I sit down to write.  After dinner last night, as I stared at the page, Rob came into the room to check on me and I told him I thought I was done with writing because I just can’t write about this topic…beauty.  I asked him if he would write today’s post and he willingly agreed.  Thanks to my honey for rescuing me in writing about this topic.}

Hello readers of Gracious Goodness,

My name is Rob. I am Amy’s husband of 26 years, and she has graciously allowed me to guest-write her post today. Actually, she sort of begged me to write it and because there are very few things I can say “no” to her about, here I am. I only made one request of her which is she can’t tell me what to write or, more importantly, what not to write.

She says she has writer’s block, 
but I suspect it is something else altogether. 
I think she is just too uncomfortable with today’s topic….beauty. 

As a self-proclaimed expert on beauty-of-the-Amy-kind, I will most happily share my observations on the subject.

I am married to the most beautiful of women. In every sense of the word, Amy is beautiful. There. It is said. It is in print. It is in the blogosphere. It can never be taken back. It is fact.

Me and my girl.
What really angers me is that we live in a world where women like my wife feel un-beautiful. 

How is it that anyone with her heart, her spirit, her intellect, her face, her hair, her eyes, her smile, her legs, her….well you get the picture….how could she not know and believe that she is beautiful? Doesn’t she know that a heart like hers that feels others’ pain so strongly makes her beautiful? Doesn’t she know that the dark, curly-ish hair that came back after months of chemo makes her beautiful? Doesn’t she know that the hands that knit and mend and cook and bandage little boys’ knees makes her beautiful? Doesn’t she know that the smile that melts my heart when I walk in the door makes her beautiful? The answer is so often “No”, because these are not the signs of beauty that our world recognizes.

You know what I truly wish and very often pray for? That Amy could see herself as I see her. Then she would know how beautiful she really is. And….this would really blow her mind….God sees her more clearly and more beautifully than even I do. He created her! He created her just like He wanted her to be! He makes no apologies for a wrinkle here or an unwanted pound there because He sees her as she truly is. He has His own definition of authentic beauty, and He sees all women for who He made them to be. If only we would all choose to look to Him to see our reflection rather than the pages of a magazine or TV commercial.

And just so you don’t think I am completely detached from reality, it is clear that men suffer from this same delusion that the world is a better guide to real manhood than the example set for us by God.  I fail on this count far too frequently….even now as I sit here typing and wondering if writing a “ladies blog” will be seen as weird by the husbands of some of Amy’s friends who might read this!

I think we can look to Proverbs 31:10 for a pretty accurate picture of how God defines beauty. I am so thankful to be married to and in love with a woman who “fears the LORD”, and I know that God will honor her for it.

Now, despite my rough and tough exterior (ha!), I do have a sensitive side, and so I will go ahead and confess that I love me some Sandi Patty. Seriously, I always have. And one of her songs is called “You Call Me Yours”, and I think the lyrics sum up what I want Amy and other women who question their God-given beauty to realize about themselves:

     
I hear You calling out my name as only You can do
Your voice it covers all my shame, the old You turned to new
No matter how things look to me
You see a destiny, a perfect promise

You call me beautiful, You call me righteous
You call me worthy of Your Son’s own precious blood
You call me holy, You call me strong at my weakest
Forgive an impure, You call me Yours


It’s hard for me to understand exactly what You see
I slip and stumble everyday but still You say believe
He’ll say you finish what you start
You’ve seen me from my heart and not the bruises

You call me beautiful, You call me righteous
You call me worthy of Your Son’s own precious blood
You call me holy, You call me strong at my weakest
Forgive an impure, You call me Yours


Amy, I see the real you and you are really pretty, really special, really smart and really, really beautiful. Please believe me. God is backing me up on this. Just ask Him.

Sincerely,
Rob

12 Comments

  1. Precious. Lovely. Seeing us as God sees us. Rising above worldly beauty to the realm of loveliness placed on us and in us by Christ. I am thankful for your post Rob. What a treasure you two are! Love, Kimberly

  2. Wow. You two are so blessed to have each other… and more importantly, blessed to have Christ as the center of your marriage and family.
    I feel blessed to know you both.
    Rob, thank you for sharing what all of us women so need to hear. Seeing ourselves through God’s eyes would make a difference in how we live and how we share ourselves with others.

  3. Love it. Ya’ll are quite the awesome pair.
    Thanks for reminding us women to see ourselves as God sees us.

    • Kelli,
      I’m going to need to keep a copy of what Rob said in my car, in my wallet, in my Bible… : )

  4. Real Men Can Write “Beautifully” Rob!

    Carleen

    • I agree Carleen! I’ll let him know you said so. Thank you!

  5. What a special post! And so very true. You two are a wonderful example of a Christ-centered marriage & family. –Linda C.

    • Thank you Linda! Hugs to your family! : )

  6. As a fellow “he-man” (?), I want to commend Rob for posting his thoughts about his wonderful wife. In Chapter 31 of Proverbs, Solomon (I presume) shares: “A good wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels.” Solomon doesn’t stop there, and Amy seems to be just the type of wife Solomon goes on to describe.

    Additionally, and if I could share, his comments about Amy brought back some (mostly) pleasant memories about a girl I dated several years ago, just before graduating from college. This girl had many of Amy’s qualities: she was pretty and intelligent, and, like Amy, had a wonderful and caring spirit. She was a pleasure to be around; the rare type of person who didn’t want to compete with me, or others, but just wanted them to feel good about themselves – and, additionally, and more importantly, to realize and experience God’s love for them. It’s funny, and probably a bit irrational – something that’s only ever happened to me this once – the first time I saw this girl, a good week or so before I actually met her, I said to myself, “Self, this could be the girl for you.” A couple of dates did nothing to dissuade this before-first impression; many times I found myself staring (mentally) in wonder when I was around her. And when I wasn’t I’d reflect on the radiance she exuded, and how fabulous I felt when she was near. The unpleasant part of this story is this: during the many years since I graduated from college I had to remember that girl as “the one who got away.” This, since, through a bit of bad luck (a charitable idea), or a large dose of downright stupidity (much closer to the truth), I did let her get away.

    Thankfully, some stories have happy endings, and God has a way of bringing good things to those who (in my case, inadequately) love and serve Him. Earlier this year, I had a chance to reconnect with Louann. I sent her flowers and we emailed for several weeks; thirty years after we first met, we had a(nother) date. I was not really surprised to find Louann still had the same wonderful qualities I remembered from the too-brief time we dated – only I guess now they have a wonderful sort of maturity about them. She is still intelligent and pretty (like Amy, perhaps, she does think I’m just trying to be nice when I tell her that), and she still has the kindest heart. She is committed to serving the Lord, and she still always has on offer a gentle or sympathetic word. Louann is intriguing, funny, tender-hearted, and quick-witted. She brings out the best in me; she makes me feel I can do anything. In short, Louann makes me feel everything is just – a lot – better, when I am with her.

    I know Rob feels blessed to have spent most of his adult life with someone as wonderful and talented and caring – and beautiful – as Amy. Maybe this time I will be a bit smarter, and perhaps have the opportunity to spend my remaining days with someone similarly special. Or perhaps (looks doubtful, doesn’t it?) I or my long-lost friend will conclude a permanent relationship is still not for us. (A supplementary thought: While I’m still not as smart as I could be, an additional thirty years of experiencing life hasn’t gone completely to waste…) One of the few things I do know, for sure: God will love us, and be in control, either way.

    Regardless of the form our new relationship takes, let me conclude by saying that, like Amy, Louann is beautiful both inside and out. Perhaps this shouldn’t come as too much of a surprise, since they are sisters.

    • Thank you! We think Louann is a special woman of God as well!

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