Hey! This morning’s been a bit odd. Every man with the last name “Ward” is home this weekend but they’ve all abandoned me for a men’s satellite conference at our “church of family origin,” St. Luke Methodist. I hope they come home pumped for Jesus and being godly men on a mission. Not that we’re having trouble. We’re not. I just know how much I need a dose of godly womanism from time to time…all the time.
This morning’s quiet is a contrast to last night which was noisy but I loved every minute of it. We celebrated Rob’s upcoming birthday (next Thursday) with the extended family last night. Twenty people were here for dinner and we were missing…let me count in my head…eight who were away for various reasons. I fixed beef burgundy over rice, a green salad with mandarin oranges, strawberries, and almonds in a light vinaigrette, squash casserole, rolls, and carrot cake for dessert (along with a candy bar cake for those who can’t tolerate carrots in a cake). I was on my feet all day. After two loads of dishes, some hand dishwashing, and starting the table linens to clean, I called it a night.
Today, I’ve been catching up on the foot therapy while watching Andy Griffith on tv. I did some quiet time in the Word while rolling my foot over a frozen water bottle. I’ve got to get my skills on for that therapy. It takes me forever. But, it feels so much better ’til the next round when I do the 8 different sessions 2x through, three times a day. I have yet to get around to doing them all for the specified number of times each day. My life just gets in the way!
Today I awoke with the resolve to do the following:
- drink my 1 tsp of psyllium husks in cranberry concentrate diluted with 8 ozs. water
- take my multi-vitamin
- have my breakfast of Publix breakfast bread, toasted and a “healthy” egg (has the Omega-3’s, no antibiotics, no hormones, and 25 % less fat) “fried” in a tsp. of “good” butter blend also with Omega 3’s.
- have one cup of coffee (I have to have my coffee, regardless)
I’ve done that plus have taken my otc n-said med.
The rest of the day? Here are my goals:
- drink some water to dilute the meds that are now causing me to feel a bit yucky
- drink more water
- drink warm lemon water
- work on Bible study
- do my therapy a couple more times
- pray without ceasing
I was thinking about the progress I made this summer in some areas regarding food and exercise. Since the fall began I have dropped the food part…have grown careless. Now, by default I’ve dropped the exercise until my foot heals and the doctor says, “walk.” It’s a bummer.
When I went to therapy this past week, the man asked me what my goals are. I rattled off a bunch including for my foot/leg to be healed and ending with something about wanting to look like an athlete when it’s all over (nervous laughter in the background). He smiled and basically said that we would just work on the foot to start with, you know…a baby step approach.
That’s hard when you have an overly-aggressive goal in mind. This guy knows that unrealistic expectations lead to disappointment and defeat. So, we’re just going to focus on the main thing for now. Getting the foot and leg back in good order. He also knows that to be too aggressive would lead to burnout.
I just find it hard to be a balanced woman in every area of life. Anybody else (male or female) have this problem? I just want a bit of balance, Lord…in everything. I can be thin but totally out of Bible study. That’s happened before! I looked great and felt good but my ego was bigger than the weight I had lost and I became a memorizer of my Weight Watchers’ manual above Scripture and time with God.
Paul’s verse about knowing what to do but not doing it…boy, that’s me.
What do you suppose God says to us when we are living out of balance? I hear Jesus say to come to Him because I am weary and burdened. He’ll give me rest. I am to take His yoke. His burden is easy.
He wants to share the load. He wants me to give Him my load and partner with Him to walk through this. I dare not go through this without Him. Why do we act like we are all alone when in the midst of struggle? It’s a bit selfish.
I also hear God say like He told Samuel when trying to select Israel’s king. He told Samuel that He looks at the heart of a person and not the outside. No matter how we look on the outside and according to the world’s standards, God could care less. That’s not where His focus is so why should ours be there?
It’s our heart that needs to be right before God. It’s the heart that needs to be in shape spiritually (and yes, we need to do our part to keep it healthy from a physical point of view in order to serve Him in ministry). I want my heart to beat the same beat as God’s heart. I want my heart to be unified with His.
From God’s perspective, how does my heart look? Worried, tired, hopeless, and distressed? Or is it relying on Him, trusting His plan in this trial, hopeful, and resting?
What about yours?